This blog is not going to be as witty as it should be, as it's the second time I've written it. When I tried to publish the first one, it vanished. Damn. Anyway...
The unemployment office was a total waste of time. I was late getting there because I forgot how bad traffic is after 8am (which is when I'm usually already at work). My appointment was at 9 and I made it by 9:12 - I know 12 minutes is fashionably late for parties, but when it comes to getting money from the gov't, it's just late. So I handed over my ID and my paperwork and took a seat for about 3 minutes, then they called my name. The very nice woman behind the counter checked my ID again. She said they were checking for fraud; I guess by making applicants show up to prove they really existed. Then she complimented me on filling my paperwork out correctly and gave me a list of entertainment industry websites. Now, that would have been pretty cool, but 1) I don't need them and 2) anybody with 2 brain cells to rub together could have found them. She also told me I could go to Van Nuys from now on and use that office's fax machines and stuff for free. So I thanked her and went on my way. I was in my car by 9:25.
Actually, what happened to me between leaving the office and driving away was the most interesting part of my day. There was a man walking towards the front door as I was leaving and he said something along the lines of "how is your morning." I'm not exactly sure, since I don't pay too much attention to what people passing on the street say, but I was polite and said ok, or fine, or something. I continued to my car and by the time I got there, I realized he had followed me. I wasn't scared, but I was nervous and I couldn't manage to pick my sunglasses up from the seat, so I climbed in and tried not to sit on them.
So I'm in my car and he walks up to the window and, being a polite person for the most part, I rolled down my window a bit. He asked me if I was from the Midwest - yeah, weird question. I told him I was from Tennessee and he went into this spiel about having gone to school in North Dakota and how he was always looking to meet someone who wasn't from California and did I want to go and get coffee? I told him I didn't think my husband would like that and he replied very calmly that I didn't have to tell my husband. Wow. So I told him I appreciated the offer but that I wasn't interested and he finally walked away. I was so freaked out by the whole thing I called the husband and left a message telling him all about it.
I've never considered myself attractive. I'm 5'5" tall and I weigh more than I should. I do workout and I'm pretty muscular, so I look better than you'd think from my numbers, but I still think I'm fat. I've always been fat or considered myself fat (same thing for me). And right now my hair is about an inch long and ranges in color from blond to faded red to darker red to that unfortunate blue (with some spots of what can only be called purple). So that doesn't help, either. But I've never really had any experience with dating and stuff - never had a real boyfriend before the husband. I mean, I don't usually even recognize flirting - I just think it's two people chatting, having a good time. But it's hard to miss an invitation for coffee. That man asking me out put me in a total panic. Yikes. Stupid, but I just don't understand why anyone would want anything to do with me unless they already knew me. I don't see any visual appeal. Nothing you look twice at if I walked by on the street.
I'm going to have to talk to Shrink about this, but it'll come back to one thing that we've already discussed. It's something one of my brothers told me when I was little and already fat. "Guys don't dig fat chicks." Yes, it was the 70's and I believed it from that moment on. Still do...
I've forgotten to write what I had for breakfast. Today was an egg and some kidney beans (met my trainer at the gym). Yesterday was a bar - French Toast, I think.
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